iKilled you
by SeddiexTwilight
Summary: Freddie will find out a lot of shocking and sad things when he reads the diary of Sam Puckett who died 3 years ago...


**Hey ****guys! **

**I can't say a lot... I just was in the mood for this one shot.**

**||It's been 3 years since Freddie's and Carly's best friend Sam died after she gets hit by a car. He just has some pictures of her and the videos of their web show they did together. And after a weird dream he finds a box with a lot of memories in it and even Sam's diary. ||**

**I don't own anything.**

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"_This is the last iCarly." Carly said trying not to cry. "You maybe noticed that Sam isn't here today..." A tear fell down her face. _

"_She gets hit by a car... She will never be here again..." Now she was sobbing and more tears fell down her face. And I could also feel how tears rolled down my face. I felt sorry for Carly she was standing sad and alone...yeah alone because her blonde co-host was dead._

_Sam just gets hit by a car. The doctor in the hospital couldn't help her and only shook his head when he came to Spencer, Carly and me when we were waiting outside of a room in a cold corridor. Carly broke out in tears and I just stood there shocked until I went to Carly and hugged her. And so we stood there in this cold corridor crying after god or whoever stole our best friend.__

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I lay in my bed and can't sleep. I had a dream of Sam and me few minutes ago. It was a weird dream, a dream that really fazes me. The dream was in nowhere. I just saw me and Sam laughing and having fun. We talked about school and iCarly and what we wanted to do in the next show. It was like I really could hear her laugh... And then the picture changed. Again I was with Sam but now we were on the balcony. Sam apologized for telling people that I've never kissed a girl. And then I saw us kissing. It was like I really felt her lips on mine... But then suddenly everything went dark and then few seconds later she disappeared. The place she sat on... there was nothing. I was alone there... alone in the darkness.

And so I woke up confused and not knowing what that meant. I didn't dream of Sam for almost a whole year. When some time went by... I guess after six months I decided to push my memories to the back of my mind and not to think about Sam that much anymore. I thought its better it wouldn't help. At the beginning it was really hard and I couldn't sleep.

Yeah and now I dreamed of her... Maybe I'm stupid but that can't be pure chance. I look at my cell phone today is not a special day or something and it's also no special time that could have anything to do with Sam. I stand up and go to the kitchen I want to drink something. But suddenly I stub my toe on a box I look down. Right the box with old stuff in it. Today I cleared out my room because I didn't have enough space anymore. I put up the box, go to my bed and opened the light.

I don't even know what's in this box so I just open it. And straightaway the past is in front of me. There are a lot of pictures of Carly, Sam and me on some pictures is also Spencer. I burrow in this box and can't believe that this box was supposed to be in garbage or at the scary garret. There's a lot of iCarly even the blue remote control which Sam always held in her hand when we did out show. I pause for a moment. I miss Sam... I really miss fighting with her, I miss it how she always teased on me, and I miss the names she always called me.

There's also a book in this box. A book wouldn't fit in this box with the whole web show stuff. And so I take it. It's a purple book where's written on 'Diary'. I don't have a diary and I want to know from which person is it so I just open the first side.

"3rd January, 2009

So I start to write in a book (I don't want to call it diary) about my feelings and some special incidents. It's not that I don't have friends I have great one but sometimes there are things I can't even tell Carly.

I guess I'll write just one sentence everyday. I'm lazy. Okay this one is an exception because it's like an introduction. Whatever... The sentence for today is: I had my first kiss with Freddie, it's our secret and I kinda liked it (but he's still Fredweird)..."

My eyes widen when I realize that this diary belongs to Sam Puckett. I'm really surprised I didn't know that she had a diary. Maybe there were a lot of things I didn't know... things I could know about I just have to read this. I'm not sure if I should do this but I'm curious and I have so many questions. So I flip through her diary. I don't read everything just some things they look interesting.

"11th April, 2009

Pete this stupid idiot broke up with me after I changed myself only for him..."

"16th May, 2009

One time I come to Freddie for help without teasing on him and he says that I'm just jealous..."

Now I'm kind of depressed. Sam never knew that Missy just went to that cruise because of me. I know at the beginning I really didn't believe her but when she left after she came to me... I felt horrible. And so I gave up that trip.

"27th June, 2009

Freddie and other boys love it to be right. So I really admitted that I don't have a twin sister, that Freddie is not gullible and that he's to smart for me....I know the truth."

I skip some dates and just go to the last sites.

"26th September, 2009

I'm depressed. Nobody wants me. First Gibby doesn't want to go to the dance with me and then when I go to Groovy Smoothie I see Freddie and Carly dancing... There were about 700 boys they wanted to go to this dance with her and she dances with Freddie. Maybe he'll finally get what he always wanted: Carly Shay. And maybe I'm a little bit jealous...(this was more then one sentence)"

I'm shocked. Sam saw me and Carly dancing? I didn't notice her. But she has got that part wrong... Carly and I danced because our dates were annoying and we just wanted one nice dance. I feel how tears fall down my face. She has got so many things so wrong and didn't really understand what it meant... Not only with this dance thing also a lot of other things. She was a lot of times so wrong...

I don't want to read more but something let me read the last side. It's the date where Sam died. These are the lasts thoughts she had before she gets hit by this car. I read it and cry harder. I'm the reason why Sam died! I'm the one who killed her! I cry and sob and suddenly my mother runs in my room.

"Freddie! Why are you crying?" I just hug my poor and confused mother.

"Sam she..." I say through my tears but I don't finish him just hug my mom.

On the last page was really just one sentence.

"24th October, 2010

Freddie saved Carly's life but he won't save mine..."_

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**_So in this story iSaved your life already happened xD _**

**_I know the last part is not that good... But I'm so tired right now! Its 4.17am..._**

**_And REVIEW! It would be sooo awesome if I see a lot of REVIEWS tomorrow ... That would make my day! x)_**


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